It is 8:15, but it feels like midnight - or - 3 days from now. I am wondering about 'happy'. My uncle drills into my head that all you need is PMA - Positive Mental Attitude. He repeats it like you can just decide you need to be happy and presto - it happens. I was wondering today though, if you were not born to a certain disposition and that is what you have for your life. You can try to outwit it, outsmart it, decide differently, and berate yourself into change but like other quirks of life, you cannot outrun it, and you begin to believe you are born that way and destined to be that way until you die. I vote with the quirks. You are stuck with it no matter what you want to believe or change. Tonight, my predisposition has taken over. I cannot wish, will, or urge what I wish I was like to take over what is really inside me. I know you know how I feel.